Lillian and Mick have been sole carers for their three sons for over 40 years. They've been telling us how Bury Shared Lives has given them peace of mind and time back to themselves.
Why did you come to Bury Shared Lives for support?
Ever since we became parents, we have been carers for Michael (42), Liam (32) and Paul (28) and we have never had a weekend off. Although it's been difficult at times, particularly as they grew older and needed to find new things they enjoy, they are still our sons and we wouldn’t change them for the world.
We felt we were slowing down and wanted to be sure our sons would be taken care of in the future, so we got in touch with the social work team, who suggested Shared Lives.
How do you find working with the Bury Shared Lives team to get short stay (respite) support for your sons?
We feel like we really have had support and someone's always there for us. The Bury Shared Lives team visited several times to get to know Michael, Liam and Paul. Tia's regular visits helped to build trust and familiarity, which was especially important, as they didn't like the idea of staying away from home to start with.
How we did the matches was brilliant; Tia made it really easy and explained everything. Once the potential matches were set up, she took the lads to a café to meet three potential carers and they each chose a carer to stay with. Liam and Paul chose to stay together with Paul and Michael chose Elaine, as he wanted some time away from his brothers. They each had three carers to choose from, so it was their choice, rather than someone telling them what to do."
They book short stays for one weekend a month and it's done in advance so it suits both carers; it's all really organised and everyone communicates really well.
What changes have you noticed in Michael, Liam and Paul since they started getting support from Bury Shared Lives?
Since they started having weekends away in January 2026, Liam, Michael and Paul are really benefitting from trying new things, new activities, meeting new people and making friends. They all get on really well with their carers. They don't want to come home now, they're enjoying themselves too much!
What does Bury Shared Lives' support mean to you, as parents and full-time carers?
We get really excited during that last week before the short stay weekend as we know they will all be having a good time and we can relax. We enjoy having time to ourselves to sit in the garden and we can go out now without worrying about rushing back.
We asked Michael, Liam and Paul what they think about Bury Shared Lives:
"We stay Friday to Sunday once a month," Michael says. "We love going. I go swimming and out on walks and I'm learning guitar. Liam and Paul go to the pub, football and for days out like Blackpool and Llandudno. Shared Lives is a good idea because you get to do different things. We love going."
What would Lillian and Mick say to anyone considering trying Bury Shared Lives?
If you're thinking about trying Shared Lives for someone you love, go for it 100%. We couldn't be happier with everything.
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